I swear, the unique thing about the Onion is their deadpan. You just have to wonder how many times these guys cracked up while they were filming this. -- Do Glass Pipes, Incense Prove Teens Are Practicing Shamanism?
Randy Thomas, Vice President of Exodus International:
"As for your blog, I don't swim around in pools full of broken glass."
Pat Robertson: "Ladies and gentlemen, just figure this, you got somebody--he’s really weird--and his “sexual orientation” is that he likes to have sex with ducks...Is he protected under hate crime [legislation]?"